- Yeon-Og Choi is a young widow and mother of three. Yeon-Og's husband, In-Keun, was just months from completing his PhD when he was diagnosed with stomach cancer. Their two children were in Vacation Bible School at St. Mark's the week their father lay dying in hospice. Here is their mother's testimony:

I thank God who gave me a new life, love and grace.

I’ve never expected my husband got a cancer and lose my loved one.

During the most difficult times in our life, we were holding hands together and pray and give Thanks to God. My husband said that some people can die by an earthquake, by car accidents, by a disaster or by a war. I’m just the one of them. I’m not the only person who is suffering from the unexpected trial.

One day, I remembered that it was a very sad day. He was sitting on the chair at the porch and sobbing and asking God. He knew that the Chemo therapy was not working well and he had experienced a lot of pain all over his bodies. It was very painful for me to see him crying alone.

In-Keun said to “God…I know you love me. But why are you giving me such a painful circumstances like this?” I couldn’t talk anything in front of him and I started crying also.
I do not know what to do…I wanted to help him to get out of the pain but I realized that I had no control with it. I felt so weak, vulnerable and miserable. I was just praying…”God…Please… god…take all the pain away from him. I love him so much…so much…do you know?” 

“Please… God… Where are you now?” “Why don’t you heal my husband and why don’t you answering our desperate prayer? “Why you gave us an unplanned baby?” “Are you going to take such a wonderful daddy to the heaven?” I felt like I’m on the desert alone without water. I felt like there is no way to get through this rough road. I was just crying with him and finding Jesus.

“Some wondered in desert wastelands, finding no way to a city where they could settle. They were hungry and thirsty, and their lives ebbed away. Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble, and he delivered them from their distress. He led them by a straight way to a city where they could settle.”(Psalms 107:4-7)

On the 27th of June, it was the last day of his life and he was surrounded by his friends and neighbors. It was the last moment to see my husband. I was talking to him with a calm voice. “Honey, Jesus loves you and will stay with you forever. I know you don’t want to leave me. I don’t want to let you go, either. But if he has another plan and take you to the heaven, don’t worry about me and your children. Jesus is taking care of me and children. I know Jesus gives me everything what I need. Honey, I promise I will take good care of our children.”

On the last day, I took a guitar and sang with his friends and neighbors. The name of the last song was “Because he lives…” “Because he lives…”He was sleeping but I watched him listening my last song.

Because he lives I can face tomorrow
Because he lives all fear is gone
Because I know I know He holds my future
And life is worth the living just because He lives!

I know God loves me and he knows me and how to bless me through this trial.

“But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold.”     - (Job 23-10)

Since my loved one passed away on the 27th of June 2006, a young widow with three little children just started to battle and struggle with the broken hearts.

When daddy passed away, my baby was only 3 and half months old. She was so little and I had to take good care of Grace and other two children (10 and 6 years).

My neighbors and friends went back to a normal life after my husband died of cancer.
I wasn’t normal, only grieving and my hands were always handful for my children and other many chores.

I was still looking for God…and I was so overwhelmed by grief…children…I do not know what to do. All I wanted was God’s peace… Please leave me alone…me alone… I can’t handle this…God…This is too much… I can’t even breathe…with no oxygen.

I was so lonely, hopeless and broken-hearted… God… What is this situation for? I’ve lost everything… my life, my hope, my dream, my joy, and my happiness.

In-Keun and I had an American dream when we came to USA in summer 1992. In-Keun studied for a long time to pursue the Ph.D degree and wanted to become a professor in USA. He was so close to finish his long journey….His dream was ready to blossom into a beautiful flower.

Suddenly, he got cancer…and he’s gone….forever….our dreams turned into a piece of paper…my children terribly missing daddy. I’ve been crying and asking God’s plan for our family. “God… What is your bigger plan?” What his Ph.D degree means after he’s gone? It means nothing without him…I received his Ph.D degree from UNL in December, 2006 after he passed away. At the hooding ceremony, all the family gathered were so happy to have the Ph.D degree except for me. I was so sad…only tears and tears…crying…a lot…

I just met Denice Aten about a week before my husband died. She took good care of him when he was dying… we both became very close friends and she showed me a true friendship and a role model of Christian. She’s been always thinking about my family and providing us with enough oxygen so our family can breathe during the most difficult times. I thank God who sent us beautiful angels like Denice and her husband, Gregg. I thank God I’m learning many lessons through this ordeal. I thank God for showing me his true love and I looked at Jesus on a cross dying for my sins.

My husband had a strong faith to God even last minutes of his life. My husband wasn’t afraid of death, just worried about his family’s well-being.

My husband believed in Jesus and his promise.

“Jesus said, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this? (John 11:25-26)”

I believe In-Keun’s singing with Jesus with no more pain in heaven.
Now, I have another dream come true in the future.

My dream is to get another degree at UNL and have enough income to feed my three children and to help other people.  I want to be a capable person in this society. I’m still dreaming and having hope in Jesus. I believe God is making a way and he is still working for my family’s future. I do not know what he’s plan now but I will trust and follow him because he lives. I do not know when… but God will reveal his secret and glory through me and my family in his plan.

“I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.”(Romans 8-18)

“Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation. With joy you will draw water from the wells of salvation” (Isaiah 12:2-3)